The Cooler

I'm a bit pressed for time this morning so this abbreviated version of the Cooler will have to do.

A- Herald: The I-95 "Lexus Lanes" are officially a success, says the people who created them.

The Florida Department of Transportation has claimed victory against chronic traffic congestion on Interstate 95 -- at least northbound traffic in Miami-Dade -- thanks to the new toll express lanes.

[...]

According to the report, motorists who use the two variable-toll express lanes now travel at an average speed of 56 mph during rush hour -- 36 mph faster than before the lanes opened. Even drivers who use the four free lanes are traveling faster at peak times, the report said -- 42 mph instead of 20 mph.

The state defines the northbound ``peak period'' as 4 to 7 p.m.

``The program has dramatically improved the overall operational performance of I-95,'' the report said.

[...]

The report claimed that motorists were happy.

``Response from I-95 users (of both express lanes and local lanes) has been extremely positive,'' the report said.

B- Sun-Sentinel: No job? Go back to school.

Students at Florida's colleges and universities may be feeling a bit cramped these days.

Enrollment is up at 10 of the 11 state universities and at an all-time high at eight of them, including Florida Atlantic University in Boca Raton and Florida International University in Miami. South Florida's three community colleges also have record enrollments.

[...]

Money is a big reason for the boom, officials say. Reacting to the recession, some students are pursuing more education if their job prospects are poor, while others are foregoing more expensive out-of-state or private schools.

C- Sun-Sentinel: Chan Lowe.

D- Palm Beach Post: It's raining men!

BOCA RATON — A man was rushed to the hospital after apparently trying to commit suicide by jumping from a balcony inside a hotel in suburban Boca Raton.

The man, whose identity was not released, jumped from a top floor to the indoor atrium at the seven-story Hilton Suites at 7920 W. Glades Road shortly after 8 p.m., according to Palm Beach County Fire-Rescue officials. Authorities are treating it as an attempted suicide and the man was taken by ambulance to Delray Medical Center.

E- WPLG: Alonzo makes his return.

MIAMI -- A former Miami Heat star will return to the team as a new vice president, the Heat announced Thursday.

According to the team, Alonzo Mourning has been named the vice president of player programs. His duties will be to provide support and mentoring to the players, helping their personal and professional development.

F- NBCMiami: NBCMiami continues to be the place to find the non-news in Miami with their coverage of yesterday's PETA protest on Biscayne Boulevard.

Our friends at PETA were at it again Thursday, this time to defend our underwater friends.

A handfull of protesters, topless (with pasties) and covered in green paint, pretended to be fish out of water on the corner of Flagler Street and Biscayne Boulevard in honor of something called National Fish Empathy Day.

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